26 May 2011
If you see me smiling, it is because I have something big, hard, and shiny up my sleeve. The exclusive photo (at left) shows my new timepiece acquisition, a Rolex Oyster Perpetual Submariner, which I wrote about recently in this column. It is the new Submariner model introduced in 2010, featuring cerachrome bezel and solid lug and bracelet. The dial sports a bold black face, which certain people might find offensive; these people should be politely told to fuck off. I do plan to wear the watch whilst swimming, diving and spearfishing, for which it was intended. But in the meantime I wear it to the office, where I can be found pairing it, as in the photo, with a W.H. Taylor candy-striped dress shirt with spread collar and a Brooks Brothers 3/2-roll grey sharkskin sack suit made, I am told, from the skin of a genuine great white shark. Note, too, my deeply tanned hand; tan courtesy of the cocktail garden party circuit.